Need ... sleep.

Need

Sleep

Need

Sleep

Need

Sleep

I'm craving for a goodnight's sleep but I can't seem to get any lately. I guess it's that time of the year again, where every twist and turn alerts my senses, making myself restless, driving me crazy and it's draining my energy more and more as the days go by. Even if I managed to force myself to sleep, it's usually just the body that rests. My head however, doesnt know the meaning of a fucking rest, I suppose. Urgh. For once, I want my body and my brain to be in sync so I can have a dreamless, satisfying sleep. I need that. Just for one night. I can't cope with only half of my body being asleep while the other half is itching to go for a stroll in the park anymore. This insomnia-ish thing has got to stop or my level of sanity is gonna be close to non-existent soon. God please help me get some rest cause this is literally affecting my performance in class. Dozing off in class is becoming a habit now and man, that's bad.

 I'm exhausteddddddddd

16? Already?

Today should be the second day of the second half of 2013. Already, huh? Yeah, it's true what they say; time flies. Because it really feels like it was just yesterday when I took my first paper for PMR. The nerve, the excitement, the twisted knot in my tummy, I could still feel it.

Ah damn, I wish time could take it easy for awhile 'cause I really don't wanna be 17 too fast. I'm 16 now.... how the fuck did that happen?! D: 

The next thing I'm going to say is probably gonna make the lower secondary students go 'Oh damn she's bonkers', but kids, I miss being a PMR candidate so badly. Life was still easy back then and those 8 subjects? You can ace them, no problem. But you still have to study la of course.

My senior told me the same thing last year and I couldn't believe a word so I laughed and replied 'It is soooooo hard to be in my shoes rn, you have no idea. I'm dying ohmygosh' and now, I really feel like taking that back because first, I sound stupid and second, I finally understand them after standing in their shoes.
SPM, my friend, is a murderer.
Biology, Addmath, Physics, Chemistry ; a combo from hell.
The others are a pain in the ass too so yeah, no worries. You know, PMR is child's play once you get involved with these subjects. I'm really not looking forward to SPM especially when I'm a science student.
Hmm, Science stream; get. out. of. it.

The subjects are not the only thing that changes when you get into form 4 though. From what you learn, to the style of learning, it's all different. And from this point on, there's no more playing around 'cause you will be in for a ride. If you don't know how to carry yourself throughout these two years of hell, you're basically dead.
I'm dead.
But I'll try my best. No more fooling around then.... 

AND THAT SUCKS BECAUSE FOOLING AROUND IS MY FORTE PFFT.

Whatever. I still can't believe I'm 16. Alright.

hi again.

Mm it has been awhile (yeah, 10 months) since my last post and I figured I should write something , anything at all for you guys to read :) 

AS IF.

No one ever reads my blog. It's a ghost town here. So yeah, the best way to explain why I'm here after going missing for almost a year is because I'm bored.

I'm lying on my bed in my towel, soaking in the laziness and I don't know what better things to do. Okay don't tell me to study, please. I won't. Go, cry me a river, beg me, persuade me with anything at all and I will still be very hesitant to study if not completely rejecting the idea of opening a book. 

Good God why can't life be more exciting by just lying down .... oh hahaha I guess that's why good dreams exist. Lie down, close your eyes and have the time of your life! In your head. Mmm. 

I'm still bored though ... HI.

I think I wanna continue posting stuffs on this blog. Oh yknow since I got a new phone and all :P so the blog is pretty much accessible anytime anywhere... chicken. 

Hm.

That was random.

Before I go, lemme just tell you that my life is stepping up a notch lately and weeeeeee it feels good. SO BLOODY GOOD to be happy again and it's all thanks to this one special somebody :3 

Cheerios.

Hypocrite much? Oh you 'bitcha'

First of all,

So one day, I did some artsy work on some paper cut-outs, card boards, paints and whatnot which was a way of me killing time in school. And to my surprise, I received a few compliments regarding those 'works' I've been doing from a number of my friends but one girl negatively commented on them and said it was worthless, a waste of my time and that I was just creating a gimmick. I accepted her comments without contradictions except for the gimmick part. Honestly, her logic is so fucked up. Is it even wrong to create something for myself without getting called an attention seeker? It's not fair because the whole idea of me doing those stuffs were just for the sake of my own satisfaction.

So that's strike-one for the little nuisance.

Much much later....

I found out that she has been carrying out the same art project I did which she directly said to me how annoying it is TO HER. So why is she copycat-ing me? Hypocrite much? I wouldn't say so if she haven't commented anything bad on whatever I was doing, but then she did and indirectly showed hatred towards it. So when she did the similar 'snitchy' work I did, there's no doubt that she's just being envious before and her ego made her say something that could hinder me from continuing from whatever shananigans I was happily doing so she could just steal my idea away and make it hers. Okay, I might sound a bit vain here but that's how I see it ._. 

What I did was not a gimmick. But what you did WAS!

 You judge, I judge.

AND THAT'S STRIKE-TWO, MOTHERFUCKER.